How's THAT for suspense.

Ok ok. So I know it's been awhile, and I've heard from many of you that you've been waiting on a new posting and are starting to get the shakes. (It could have also just been the fanbase I've created in my head - those voices are so REAL!). Anyway, so much has happened since I last wrote, and I figured I'd better write the latest before Halloween hits, because that obviously earns its own posting, and then events get ahead of documentation and well it's just a blogger's avalanche.

(Deep inhalation)

SO.



The past month has gifted us with some extremely special visitors. First, my best friend Dana, who travelled with her boyfriend, Doron, to the U.S. from Israel. It was such a special trip, as I get to see her maybe once per year, and Max met his Auntie Dana for the very first time. We all had such fun, hanging at the house and taking them around our 'hood for lunch and sightseeing. Her trip schedule was pretty jam packed as her brother got married the following week, so we only had one day with each other. It wasn't nearly enough time, but nor would have been a year's worth of time with her. It's never enough.

Lauren, Elliott, Riley, Max, Heidi

The very next day, I got to see one of my other best friends, Lauren, and meet her insatiably adorable son, Elliott! They flew in with Lauren's mom from Ohio for a visit. If you're friends with me on facebook, you've surely seen some of her amazing photography in the pictures she took of Josh, Max and I at the park. Lauren, our friend Riley, and I got together for dinner and then lounged around with our rugrats the following day. We watched TMZ and had wine and it was beautiful.

Last but not least, Josh's Aunt Susie and Uncle Mike flew out from North Carolina to meet their great nephew Max. We enjoyed every minute with them, shopping, going out for snacks, and visiting with each other at the house. They also babysat the little boog so that Josh and I could venture out to - hold on to your hat - see a movie. We saw Moneyball, which was good, in case you acidentally stumbled onto my page instead of Rotten Tomatoes. Two desperately unmanicured thumbs up. Anyway, their visit was just great.

"She has no idea she's going to change this diaper"

On the day-to-day front, Max and I busy ourselves with all sorts of outings. You know how I know I'm a suburban stay at home mom? Because I go to things like "Moms On The Move" and "Musicology" and meet up with friends and their little ones to swing by places called Zoolikins and Tush. All jokes aside, I have found it to make a huge difference in my sanity level when we venture out of the house at least once per day.

One of our weekly outings consists of physical therapy, which started last week. Not uncommon, our little Maxamoo has a condition called torticollis (I always think of a tortoise with colic. And now you will, too). Basically, his left neck muscles are tighter than the right, perhaps from chillin' in the womb in the same position for too long, and subsequently, he favors looking to the right. While it's not a huge deal in the immediate future, it can cause positional issues down the road. We are being taught some stretching exercises and other efforts to help his neck muscles lengthen. Since he overdoes it with the right-sided stuff, it doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure that we must encourage Max to look to the left as much as possible, to even the score. Now, the picture below illustrates my creative attempt to offer up a novel visual for Max to gaze at while holding his head to the lefthand side. By scrolling down to the image below, you agree in good faith to not copy, paste, email, BLACKmail, or anything in the 'chortle' family.

Switching gears, wanna know what's redonk? This kid's personality. He smiles and laughs all the time; we don't even have to earn it. Josh and I are savoring this time in his life for every morsel it's worth. He giggles now - and not just the "AHH" sound with a smile (pssh), but an actual "HA HA" (note the second "ha", which constitues a true laugh for all intents and purposes). Every morning I look over into his crib, I am greeted with a smile the size of a Zoolikin, whatever that is. And it's like sparkplugs to my heart. He will be 3 months old on November 2nd, and I know exactly what people meant when they warned me, "it goes by so fast". 'Cause it does.

So there you have it! That's the latest. Stay tuned for future posts, the next of which is sure to recap this weekend's Halloween festivities. As a teaser, know this: Max is a chicken. And I, in my attempt to stay hip and not stray too far off the path of Halloween Costumes Past (you know - any underpaid profession uniform, three sizes too small), have decided that I may - just MAY - undo one strap of my "Farmer Heidi" overalls. Ya. Believe it.


Why, it's THIS way to the Gun Show.

Max at PT, doing an arabesque (sorry Daddy)

 

Look, Max! It's froggy mama! Look left, Max! Left! LOOK F&**!n LEFT!"



 





You know you're a new mother when . . . .

You know you're a new mother when . . . .

1. It takes you 4 hours to walk your ipad from the living room to the bedroom to plug into the charger.
2. Babycenter.com has replaced Google and/or Facebook as your home page.
3. You continue to sway in a side-to-side rocking motion after handing off your baby to your husband.
4. Blow drying your hair is reserved for only those occasions on which you are sure you will be seeing other adults (makeup and any pants of the non-sweat variety apply here, as well).
5. You start talking to your coffee.
6. You hear your baby stir in the middle of the night and you, before completely waking up, have a glorious dream that you hired an evening nanny. (True story).
7. The thought of heading to the grocery store with your infant makes you sweat and end up in the pantry, talking yourself into preferring the expiring corn flakes you've been grazing on the past six days.
8. You laugh at all your high heels and wedges as they get kicked further and further back into the closet.
9. Baby talk inadvertently finds its way into every adult conversation at least once.
10. You lock eyes with your smiling child, and your heart melts into his like they have beat as one your entire life.

A nod to the Boob Tube

As a stay at home mom (or, "SAHM", the acronym I quickly learned after posting my neurotic questions on countless pregnancy forums), I am kept quite busy taking care of our little booger, but I do get some down time. One of my hobbies that has grown into more of an indulgence than ever before has been that of watching television (please pull in that lower lip that I predict has just sagged as part of a pitied response to my new, Suburban Mom agenda). I love TV! Which is a good thing, considering that this fall has brought with it a lineup of shows that are absolutely amazing, not the least of which is NBC's new hit comedy, Up All Night. It follows the life of new-parents-couple Reagan (Christina Applegate - love!) and Chris (Will Arnett - love love!), and includes, in my opinion, one of the funniest supporting roles on TV, talk show host Ava (Maya Rudolph - more loves).

The timing could not have been more perfect. When the first previews for this show were aired, I was about 8 months pregnant with "Baby K". I remember rubbing my belly while telling Josh how awesome it was that we'd be able to watch this show that will parellel our lives with the little munchkin. Fast forward a couple months, and picture it: Josh and I, new parents for just over 4 weeks and questioning everything we ever knew about anything we ever thought we knew about parenting. Or babies. Or how to center one's self. My two-day-old ponytail barely hanging on by the thread of my hair tie, giant mug-o-coffee perched on the end table as a  lifeline to sustained energy (and liquid hugs, if you ask me), I cradled a fussy Max in my arms and swayed from side to side as the pilot episode premiered. With my mind in a million places and my body begging for sleep, I doubted my ability to even focus on the show's dialogue, let alone enjoy it. But I had waited for this day for months now, and like hell if I was going to forfeit an opportunity to watch a friggin' television show.

And then it started. And it was perfect. It was accurate. It was US.

I don't know if it was the writing, the acting, or that this show so perfectly captured what it had been like for Josh and I the past month acclimating to parenthood. All I knew is that my overwhelming sense of gratitude to the creators for giving me the gift of feeling NORMAL could no better be expressed than by tears of amusement/appreciation, incessant "shrieky" laughter, and interjecting commentary of "Uh huh!"s, "You KNOW that's right!"s, "Oh my God, yes! So true!"s, and so forth. If I'd been in a movie theatre, I'd have gotten shushed and Raisinettes thrown at my head.

So consider this post a big ups to Up All Night - a show that gives an empathic high-five to the journey of parenting and trying to retain some semblance of the cool, hip young cats we all used to be before burp rags and bottle cleaners.

Thanks, NBC! You are mommy's blankie.